Daddy’s Bed
Aiming for the double or triple, but hitting the wrong bed? That’s also called Right Church and Wrong Pew, because you’re in the right neighborhood, but definitely at the wrong party. (And no, it has nothing to do with Sugar Daddy. Unless you’re really bad at darts and need someone to buy you a new board.)
Dairylea Darts
Named after a brand of spreadable cheese: Dairylea Cheese Spread. These are darts that get thrown all over the dartboard like they’re auditioning for a modern art exhibit, clearly aimless and mostly because the player has no clue what they’re doing. It’s like they’re trying to cover the whole bread slice with cheese. And honestly, it doesn’t take much imagination to compare a dartboard to a box of spreadable cheese. Just think of it as a tasty dip for those little dart tips!
Dartball
Dartball, it’s not your average dart game, this one’s got a flair for the dramatic! Imagine this, a special diamond-shaped board designed for those who want to pretend they’re Babe Ruth, but with darts. Scoring? It’s like baseball but with fewer hot dogs and more flying projectiles. Want to dive deeper into this quintessentially American pastime? Well, grab your lucky charm and enter the green card lottery! With a sprinkle of luck and perhaps a four-leaf clover, you might just find yourself stateside, mastering the art of Dartball. Batter up, I mean, dart up!
Dartboard
Ah, the dartboard, also known as the bullseye buffet or the wheel of misfortune! This iconic circular target is the centerpiece of every dart enthusiast’s dreams and nightmares. Made of tightly packed sisal fibers, it’s designed to withstand the relentless assault of wayward darts, whether they’re expertly aimed or hurled in frustration. The dartboard is divided into 20 numbered sections, each representing different point values. It’s like a carnival game, but with fewer stuffed animals and more opportunities for embarrassment. The outer ring scores double points, while the inner ring scores triple, because why not make things even more complicated? And let’s not forget the bullseye, hitting it is the ultimate showstopper, earning you 50 points and instant bragging rights. So, next time you step up to the oche (that’s the throwing line, for the uninitiated), remember that the dartboard is there to challenge you, mock you, and occasionally reward you with a triumphant thud of a well-thrown dart. Happy aiming!
Darteritis, darteritus or darteritis
Darteritis, the mysterious condition that strikes every dart player at some point in their career. Symptoms include uncontrollable shaking of the throwing arm, sudden loss of ability to hit the triple 20 and an overwhelming urge to blame the dartboard, the lighting or the alignment of the planets for your terrible aim. Scientists (okay, pub regulars) believe it’s caused by overthinking, under-drinking or the sheer pressure of knowing your friends are watching you miss the same number for the 47th time. The only known cure? A stiff drink, a deep breath and the unwavering belief that your next throw will definitely be a bullseye. Spoiler: it won’t.