I used my wife’s carpet as a dart mat. Bad idea. The floor now looks like a woodpecker’s lunchbox. Lesson learned, a proper 8mm rubber mat saves marriages and floors. Still married, thanks, dart mat!

Learned the hard way: cheap dartboards cost more in laptop repairs. That 25 bargain? Ended up being a 500 MacBook replacement! Invest in thin wires or invest in tissues.

Forget ‘Live Laugh Love’ – let’s upgrade to ‘Aim Throw Swear’ with a classy dartboard. It’s couples therapy with sharp objects and loser-picks-the-movie rules. Our walls deserve better than boring decor!

Your darts fly like drunken seagulls? Flights shredded, shafts wobbly, tips duller than Michael’s math skills? Fear not – with some TLC, we’ll transform your sad darts back into triple-20 assassins.

My uni darts match turned chaotic when my opponent’s flight popped off, sending a girl into Matrix-mode – she dodged the flight but wore her pint instead. Moral: Cheap stems cost more in beer replacements.

At Michael’s finals, he needed double 20. First dart landed perfect. Second dart Peter Panned it. Opponent stole the win while I learned darts has weird rules. Shafts matter, but not as much as knowing when to clap.

ichael’s ‘unmissable’ darts missed. My throw launched a nacho that his dog caught mid-air. Turns out when three different sets fail, the common denominator is you. Dart selection: equal parts skill and snack hazard.

Waltzed into a dart shop like MVG, left like a rookie. First dart missed, second nailed the ceiling fan (sorry, barista). Bought starter set, lost all dignity. Pro tip: aim for the board, not the light fixtures.